The Sandman Pony


 I wrote this with a voice recognition program while laying on the couch about to fall asleep.  Its not finished and I am still editing..  Thanks..

For my friend..  Paula..

Sarah was lost deep in thought. Her head was down and her hands were buried deep in the pockets of her wool coat as she came to the intersection of Eighth and Way.  She had her collar up to keep the chill from cutting through her but as cold as it was outside it compared nothing to the chill she felt on the inside. She was only six blocks from the hospital where her daughter Penny lay in a bed desperately trying to survive another day. Her poor little frail body was desperately battling the effects of the chemotherapy and the ravages of the cancer inside her. 

"Eight and Way" she thought to herself looking up at the street sign. I don't remember this area.This must be an old part of town. The streets were a patchwork of old cobblestone and brick and the shops hadn't seen much paint and last decade or so. She noticed a cat scratching at the door of a butcher shop, begging for scraps. In the huge display window someone had stenciled years ago Mike's Meat Shop "fresh meat daily", but Sarah wasn't hungry in fact she had no appetite at all. She spent all her time worrying about Penny and couldn't eat knowing her baby girl was fighting for her life. 

 Sarah kept her head down in her hands tucked in her pocket trying to force back tears. She stepped across a puddle that had collected in a low spot of the cobblestone road. She walked past four or five more display windows until until she came to the last one at the corner of Eighth and Way which was nicely painted with a dark green paint and brown trim and had a sign above the store said "Out of this World Antiques".

Sarah paused in front of the display window of the shop not really looking at what was inside looking more at her reflection in the glass. Having a child sick is a terrible feeling being hopeless helpless unable to do anything unable to stop Penny's pain unable to stop the horrible treatments and unable to stop the damn cancer.

 "I'm losing my flippin mind" Sarah said out loud. "What am I supposed to do"?

 She had decided to go for a walk while Penny was taken for her next . She just needed a break from the hospital. From the smell and squeaky sound of the nurses shoes as they walked up and down the hallways. 

"Just a little walk" she had thought to herself but now she had walked farther than she had intended to go.

 about it -- any wonder where I'm at she had just started to turn away from the window when something caught her eye of pony she turned back towards the glass and there was a carved wooden pony with a long flowing mane and a little red saddle something about the pony struck a chord insider recalled her in a way to many it seemed to say give me a penny a little gift for her might cheer up without thinking Sarah turned back to the store to shop and a little bell a little bill tinkled lightly softly when she opened the door


Slowly pending open her eyes she could tell someone was in the room with her she could see a blurred outline sheet link to couple times as things came in to focus was her mom and she was holding something in her arms Harry feeling Penny Sarah asked any electric violence which were still licked her lips which were still drive from the procedure water moment please she said in a dry raspy voice Sarah quickly poured water from the pitcher into the cup and gently took the she puts straw to Penny's lips as she softly puts straw into pennies now any greedily sucked the water from a cup making loud or throat making loud gulping sobs as she swallowed easy on her mom said you know if you drink too much just asked you get sick and he nodded her head just a little

set the cup back on the table got something for you Sarah said lifting the pony from the chair next to the bed and placing it on the bed next to Penny on its beautiful mom and he said slowly reaching out to take it in simple Arab girl it's a girl horse baby Mama said leaning forward to kiss her on the foreign Penny held the pony wooden pony by its front legs looking and admiring the pony space looking deep into its eyes she shaking Lee shaking her hand shaking she reached up to pet the pony's main sheet could Mama what even the colors are her mother asked Sandy Sarah said gazing deep into the pony sized with a faraway look on her face Sandy


Nighttime at the hospital is the worst the hour seemed to drag on and on for the first couple hours after Penny had gotten Sandy Mossadegh was talk to the pony and she petted it its main I can't wait to ride you Sandy want to run through the meadows ride you to the meadows Friday to the forest ride you to the mountains right across the river's ride you down in the valleys pulling Sandy the pony up close to her neck she wrapped her arms around hugging it she does not saying Sarah her say that she fell asleep as I love you Sandy



Lights flashing and darkness like fireflies in an abyss of voice calling any Penny come to a penny higher here you Penny said that where are you can't see you on here the voice said reach out your hand and in the darkness pennies and found something warm and soft and strong yes she her say with a winning is that you. Bent over in the saddle with both hands one hand on the saddle horn the other wrapped in Sandy's main Penny felt Sandy began to walk and then just dropped and then with the wind in the darkness

Where are we at she asked. In the place between awake and asleep where are we going she said said into the land of dreams said Sandy

Penny thought she could faintly make out a light pinpoint tiny small light in the distance the direction Sandy was running as she galloped harder and harder and faster and faster the light began to grow and grow and your briar and brighter until it seemed like only a moment later they were in the light and the light was all around them and there was nothing to see but light and Sandy she could see Sandy and she smiled to herself as she could see Sandy and then they galloped out the light into in the light or seemed to be a missed roof fog not sick and Sandy galloped faster and harder than Penny could almost make out or almost see things in the light and fog shapes close to Florida touch too far to make up clearly like trees cedar trees behind trees and then suddenly they burst from the fog into the early morning light and they were in a forest next to a clear blue Lake and then he could hear birds and snow the cedar trees and Penny realized the her body didn't hurt that she felt good as Sandy gal on a path past the trees on a path by the lake

Where are we at now any asked any asked we are in a dream Sandy said

My dream?

No silly not your dream you're with me you can't be in your own dream we are in the dream of one of the nurses that fell a sleep she was the closest so we went there first how do you know this is still the asked any how are you able to ride in dreams because I am the sand and his pony Sandman and for many a millennia I carried him into other people's dreams and into the place in between dreams why aren't you carrying him now and he asked because said Sandy Sandman retired me after years of loyal service so that he could ride the sand worm

Suddenly everything shimmered lake was gone and there was a farm what happened as Penny nurse woke up said Sandy Moyer now in the dream and her dream disappeared we are now in the dream in her dream ended there now and the dream of the man in room one 127 he need is a farmer or used to be a farmer for he got so sick he is dreaming of taking care of his animals and feeding them there you could see the farmer with a bucket and is blue bib overalls and his redshirt this straw hat pouring feed from a bucket into a trough for his pains and they could hear him say soon we paid good big E. got each you like that slop nice that little pigs and the farmer looked up and waved at them and he smiled and waved back

Come hold on tight now we must run and run fast this dream is about to expire the farmer is passing on to the next realm soon everything began to spin like on a merry-go-round slower and faster and faster and the ground began to fade out in the farmer still waving and smiling began to slowly fall backwards like he was sitting into a rocking chair only there was no rocking chair of whole a spinning hole like a black hole you begin to fall backwards smiling following in his sleep falling in his dream as the dream was sucked into the black hole into the vortex Sandy ran faster and faster and faster away from the whole away from the farmer until all the ones everything lurched and everything around them.out of existence and they were free running across tallgrass


Written by  Christopher Goeller